Hi everyone! The day we have been waiting for all year has landed, SABOWL XIV has begun and our friendly champ has provided a kind, helpful orientation to the madness that is coming.
Our spreadsheet will be going live later tonight with everyone’s picks so be on the look out for that.
Also, we’ll have a fix we need to make so we’ll have another game we need everyone to pick for and SABOWL for Kids XIV info will be coming soon.
Happy SABOWL season everyone!
The beginning of a new SABOWL tradition, here is our SABOWL XIII Champion Michael delivering his victory speech!
For the fourth, fifth, maybe even sixth time in SABOWL history, the SABOWL has come down to the final game! We don’t know exactly how many times we’ve had a tiebreaker situation because our SABOWL history page kind of sucks.
Nonetheless, here is our situation. We are down to Michael and Danny for SABOWL gold and tonight’s championship game will decide who wins SABOWL XIII.
The tiebreaker rules are as follows:
(1) Each competitor must predict the combined total number of points that will be scored in the National Championship by both teams. The person closest without going over wins.
(2) The tiebreaker for the tiebreaker is a prediction of how many points will be scored via field goal during the game.
The picks are in and here they are…
Danny predicts 61 total points and 12 points through field goals.
Michael predicts 31 total points and 12 points through field goals.
The Locker Room is open for anyone who would like to wish Michael and Danny luck or anything else!
I use the term contestants lightly in consideration of the meaning of the term. Being a contestant is associated with actually competing. I would like to challenge you all in this area, both in terms of your Sabowl XIII performance as well as your Locker Room participation.
We are now 15 games in to XIII. This year is showing some normal trends as well as some new ones. Here is an analysis from the first week and a half.
Izabella-Tied for the lead and is showing some promise for being a younger Sabowler. The future looks good (except when you consider Stephen*). See note below. She is currently looking to perform her new song, “Sabowl Hallelujah”.
April-Can I admit that it is nice to see April not running away with the Sabowl this year. I still would not count her out. ESPN is reporting that her recent job change was for the purpose of providing more time for Sabowl preparation. She was seen studying spreadsheets on Christmas Eve but is denying they were regarding the Sabowl.
Danny-Has been one of the most entertaining participants since his initial appearance in Sabowl V. The Sabowl has been tough on him and yet he comes back every year. It is a story of early success to only be crushed by the spread. May the spread be good to you this year but probably not.
Michael-Came out of the gates on fire and had hopes of the first ever undefeated season. Much better than Michael’s goals of a season without winning a game. When asked why he wanted to accomplish this, he stated “What are the chances you cannot win a game.” Maybe next year.
Jim-Coming off an impressive year last year, Jim is again in contention and tied for the lead. Some are saying he is already preparing for next years Sabowl. We are still looking for his first appearance in the Locker Room.
Christina-The previous Sabowl champion is having a good start. There are some rumors regarding her pick process that may create some controversy. A possible I-Team investigation is in the works.
Jonathan-Has brought some early Sabowl magic with some fancy, mancy additions to the Sabowl spreadsheet. He has always been one to where is emotions on his sleeves, hence the reason he always wears long sleeves. Lots of emotions. This is also the last year Jonathan will be participating in the Sabowl as he is retiring along with long-time Georgia Tech Head Coach, Paul Johnson.
Jimmy-Has been one of the most consistent Sabowl competitors in its history. He is looking to return to his championship form in Sabowl III when he took the championship by one game over Christina. However, typical Sabowl controversy ensued when Christina demanded a recount.
Ellen-Has already won seven games. What does this mean you may ask? She probably will not win anymore this season. However, you have to respect her hope for a championship one day. She has stated she does not want to win the Sabowl due to the pressure of protecting it for the year. I think we all know she is in “loser denial.”
Stephen-Obvious the pressures of acclimating to college have taken a toll on the Sabowl preparation. Time to evaluate priorities. Hopefully this will only be a seasonal setback for this young man.
Julian-One of the other young guns in the Sabowl. Julian had a great year last year and almost brought the championship home. Look for him to make a late run and make this an exciting finish. His goal is to have the Sabowl hanging next to all of his championship trophy deer.
Rebecca-Also known as the “Lost Sabowler”, she showed so much hope for the future of the Locker Room with her lengthy, well-written postings and comments. It has been awhile since we have seen this but we all hope for its return.
Josh-After a disastrous start, Josh has been making a comeback to get back into contention. Josh is always looking for a way to spread compassion and hope whether it is in his local hometown of Springfield, Il. or the Sabowl. He has graciously agreed to donate all of his wins this season to those who need it.
Emily-We are all thankful for Emily since she has already secured the fact that we will not do worse than her. Thank you Emily. We appreciate you for this. Sorry for your really bad season. Maybe Josh will give you some wins.
Joe-Ol’ Rockie Joe. After some early Sabowl career success, the Rockie Joe dynasty took a setback last year. It has been rumored he has been looking to start another Sabowl-like experience, the “x Bowl.” He has his sights on being commissioner and president. More to come.
We hope you enjoy the games today, especially the highly anticipated “Cheez-It Bowl”. Look for the updates in the spreadsheet and standing (depending on how well Jonathan does today.) More importantly, we need to see you in the Locker Room. Can we break a record with comments and number of participants? Let’s shoot for 200 comments with 10 people contributing.
Wow, ladies and gentleman! What a SABOWL offseason it has been. Marked with excitement, controversy, scandal, smugness, disappointment, jealousy, joy, and familial love – those are just a sample of what we’ve experienced and a foretaste of the themes we are going to see at work over the next few weeks. In anticipation of that, I proudly declare that the SABOWL XIII Locker Room is now open!
As we jump into the excitement today, I feel I must let you know the SABOWL has run into some tough situations over the past few months and we are grateful that some prominent coaches have stepped up to defend the SABOWL’s glory.
The first incident occurred when an unnamed SABOWLer woke up from a glorious dream in which they were proudly hoisting the SABOWL above their fire place. They woke up loudly exclaiming “Finally, she’s mine, all mine!!” You can imagine the disappointment when loved ones had to break the news that it was all a dream! I don’t want to go too much into what followed other than to share Jim Harbaugh’s defense of the SABOWL.
Secondly, an interviewer became aware of the SABOWL’s coverage of Mike Gundy and asked him about what he thought about the SABOWL’s flattery of his coaching successes. In true Mike Gundy style, he thought the 3/4s SABOWL site was inaccurate fiction that embarrassed him. He went on to say that he doubts that the SABOWL trophy itself has offspring before stating the following:
Lastly a little bit of praise. After ripping apart the college playoff system, Mike Leach was shown a picture of the SABOWL mascot.
We loved his response:
We’ve got a great season ahead! Stay tuned today as we get spreadsheets uploaded and have a great SABOWL kickoff today. See you in the Locker Room SABOWLers!
We are in the middle of what could be the closest Sabowl in history and the Locker Room has remained empty for the past 4 days. We still have not heard from many of the top contenders in this Sabowl. It is a good thing that Mike Gundy Day is here wake everyone up.
A few facts about this famous Mike Gundy Speach.
Things to Watch for in the Sabowl.
We are here at our annual Christmas Eve post. It is a good time to look back at what Sabowl XII has brought us.
Regardless of you are, getting Sabowled is coming. Right when you feel things are going your way. You see a win coming your way. You are so close….http://https://gph.is/2A83iJp
Defeat. Heartbreak. Crushing loss. SABOWLED!
Here are some quick notes for Sabowl XII:
1. There have been no spread heartbreaks. Makes me wonder if the Sabowl is saving some serious Sabowled moments later.
2. April….seriously? Will this be another route? A repeat performance? If April wins, can we call her the Nick Saban of the Sabowl?
3. Will newcomer, Julian, continue his pace? Hopefully not. However, we are talking about the kid who took down a trophy deer at the age of 6 and just laughed at grown men at the deer processor.
4. Seems like we have the normal contenders fighting it out for the Toilet Bowl, aka “Ticket to Dirty Dancing Marathon”. Although, we have had some tightening of the standings towards the middle and bottom.
5. We have had a guest comments from Fake News and has made some allegations against Josh and Jonathan. I Team is upset and we are in the middle of a little situation. There are rumors of a independent counsel being appointed.
6. Locker Room has been adequate but can improve. Remember, make Mike Gundy proud. Poor performances will make him want to puke.
Have a great day.
One game tonight. I will let you check out the spreadsheet. It is going to get busy so hold on.
Welcome to SABOWL XII everyone!
In a world where nobody gets along and each day’s news brings another reason to disagree, today we step into the one true reason to disagree…The SABOWL!The beauty and mystery of the SABOWL is that it simultaneously draws our family closer together & farther apart.
This season we will be unified in our hope for the glorious presence of the SABOWL to fill our home and most of us will be unified in crushing, devastating defeat. We’ve got a great season in store for us!
So many storylines to follow:
– Could No-Mo-Amacho-Joe possibly repeat his title?
– Will Josh be able to rebound from experiencing such an excruciating last minute defeat last year in the closest SABOWL race in SABOWL history?
– Could Izabella establish herself as a force to be reckoned with?
– Will Julian be this year’s coming of age story?
– Will Jonathan pick Georgia Tech to win even though they didn’t make a bowl game this year?
– How many times will Mike Gundy make an appearance this season?
– Where is the SABOWL? Historically bar-mitzvah’s correspond with SABOWL-napping and the I-TEAM is exploring some leads as this post is going live.
– How many times will Danny declare the SABOWL rigged, bemoan the spread, and quit before he is actually eliminated from contention (or wins)?
As you can see, with all these questions floating out there, we’ve got an exciting SABOWL season ahead of us!
Some notes as we enjoy today’s festivities:
Well folks, its taken me a few days to process it but we have the first 3-way-tie for the SABOWL in SABOWL history!
The best I can discern from SABOWL history and an in depth search through my gmail is that the tiebreaker is this:
(1) Each competitor must predict the combined total number of points that will be scored in the National Championship by both teams. The person closest without going over wins.
(2) The tiebreaker for the tiebreaker is a prediction of how many points will be scored via field goal during the game.
Is this correct? If so,…
My recommendation would be for all competitors to send this information to Jonathan before 5 PM EST on Monday, January 9th.
This is a great SABOWL ending, handfull of games and basically a 4-way tie for the lead!
Here’s my best analysis on the scenarios playing out today.
– Florida win would make a 4 way tie. 5 Sabo’s left. If Iowa wins, Joe wins.
– Wisconsin win would eliminate Rebecca. 4 Sabo’s left. Western Michigan wins and Rebecca is in it and needs Penn State, Oklahoma, and Clemson wins to take it to a tiebreaker with Josh and Joe.
– USC win takes it down to the Oklahoma/Auburn game to determine if Izabowla or Jim wins the SABOWL. Penn State win means its a tiebreaker between Josh and Joe for the SABOWL.
– A Penn State win and an Oklahoma win would make it a three way tie breaker between Josh, Joe, and Izabowla.
Is this close to right?
Am I the only one who hasn’t slept in 48 hours?
Also, on a bit of a sour note. SABOWL compliance officers are investigating the Michael and Christina branch of the Sabo family for a potential illegal SABOWL training program after Jack’s 9-0 Kids SABOWL start and Izabowla’s inaugural SABOWL effort. I-Team update expected in the locker room, inside sources are saying that a conspiracy is afoot that could call into question the 3 SABOWL’s previously won by the family in question.